Tami Roman Blogs About Basketball Wives, Evelyn & Real B.I.T.C.Hes
With the Reunion Show less than a week away, Basketball Wives star Tami Roman took to her blog to clear up a few things after she watched the season finale of the show. In her blog, Tami talks about Evelyn, why she was so upset, Christ, being real and what a real B.I.T.C.H is. It’s a long read. but she does say that she doesn’t smoke anymore. Check it out below.
Will the REAL B.I.T.C.H. please stand up!
By Tami RomanI watched the BBW finale episode twice this week and thought about all that went down. Man…there are a couple of things that I want to address before I get to the heart of this blog. First, I am so glad that I do NOT smoke anymore. I really looked at myself and geez that was so unattractive. Second, I HATED that short haircut! If I EVER, in this lifetime suggest that I might even be thinking of doing that look again, SMACK me – real hard LOL.
OK, down to business…so I watched the episode and I want to be clear about a few things…
I liked Evelyn. Yes, I honestly did enjoy being around her and all of the girls for that matter. They all taught me something about myself in their own way. Just as I hope, I brought some things to life for them. I am not going to say that we are “best friends” because that would be a lie and I do not use the word “friend” lightly. Although, I did feel we were all cool.The issue about her sleeping with Kenny, I really did not care about that. I was more hurt by the fact that she did not feel comfortable enough to tell me before that moment or even OFF camera. We did not hang out together like ace boon coons (damn that is an old phrase LOL) but we were around each other enough that she should have been honest with me. I honestly thought we were working towards becoming friends and to hold onto something like that really bothered me.
Anyhoo, as I sat there trying to explain how hurt I was by all of it, she kept saying, “Well it is what it is” – that just did not sit well with me. I felt she should have more empathy and humility in bringing this to me. Even with that, I could have gotten past this moment, but as the discussion escalated she got more bravado and boisterous with me. I thought this was out of pocket because in my eyes, you were the one that was wrong. I did not know you from a can of paint when I came into this situation, but you knew who I was and who I had been married to. You told me about the mistress the first time I met you and just like you told her business, you should have been upfront about yours. This is how I felt. Although, as I said, I could have gotten past this moment. It was the “You were a non factor BITCH” comment that sent me over the edge. All I thought was, no she did not just betray me AND call me out of my name. I lost all control…
As I watched the episode for the second time, I thought to myself, she called me a bitch. Why did this push me to the point of putting my hands on this woman? What is it about that word that causes so many of us to lose it? Then I realized that this word is associated with so many negative connotations.
Usually the word ” bitch ” is associated with a woman who lacks self-respect, integrity, morals, and respect for others. It is used to slander someone and degrade them. It is a profane way to express anger when you cannot articulate yourself properly. Men use it as a derogatory way to categorize women who they feel have mistreated them, used them, cheated on them or downright abused them. This particular word is a way of calling a woman the lowest of the low.
Even women in business are identified as ” bitches ” when they exude power. It is quite sad that if a woman is articulate, intelligent, no nonsense, authoritative, brutally honest and demands respect; she is not viewed as a “power player” , but a bitch. If you analyze the many negative ways this word is used, you would certainly be offended by being called one.
I on the other hand have decided to put my own spin on the word. I choose not to relate the negative stereotype with the word. After all, I cannot fly off the deep end every time I hear it. So me and my friend came up with an acronym for the word that I can live with LOL. Something that is reflective of me and my personality. B.I.T.C.H. – Believing In Total and Complete Honesty. That is definitely me! This acronym is reflective of the person I have become. I have traveled a long journey and my willingness to be open and truthful have aided me along the way. I pride myself on keeping it 100 all the time! People always want the truth, but they cannot always handle it. They often consider me to be a “bitch” because of my honesty and realness. To this I say, “Yes, I am a B.I.T.C.H., you should want to be one too. “
Listen, I have lived 40 long hard years. I have been through so many trials and tribulations that have afforded me wisdom. At this stage of the game, I have nothing to prove and I only have to please myself. I will not allow anyone to alter my happiness nor will I allow ANYONE to disrespect me or not give me the things I believe I deserve. My strength is a part of my makeup at this age – my honesty and truthfulness is the only way I know how to be.
That is why I think so many of you relate to me because I am representative of everyday people. I am a single mother w/baby daddy issues, I get up and ride the train/bus to go to work like you do and I have my own flaws that I am working through-just like you. I have been up, down and standing in the middle now. I do not put on heirs or pretend to be something that I am not. I am just me – whether you like me or not, you have to respect my honesty. I can deliver the truth seriously, comically, spiritually and sometimes “tipsy” – but the truth is what you are going to get.
In order to be a true representative of Christ and try to help people, you have to be someone that people can relate to, understand, and listen to. You have to meet people where they are. I often say, you can not be so heavenly that you are NO earthly good…God cannot use you. I definitely want God to use me to inspire, encourage and enlighten. That is not by my being perfect, but by my showing my flaws and overcoming them through hope, prayer and faith. We are all going to make mistakes, I am just putting mine out there for the world to see me work through them. Through me, I hope you will come to know that Gods grace, mercy and favor endureth forever. This B.I.T.C.H. is a living testimony.
Just remember that being a real B.I.T.C.H. means your honesty and truth come from a place of love. I offer the truth to counsel, advise, share, enlighten and encourage. I offer my truth because I am not ashamed of it – all of the things I have gone through make me the person that I am today. I expect to be told the truth for the same reasons. God wanted me to travel this journey and I embrace it because I know that by my openness, I will help someone else. However, if you are being mean, spiteful, vindictive, manipulative with a version of the truth and trying to deliberately hurt someone – I do NOT stand behind that and you have ventured away from the acronym meaning and head first into the meaning I spoke of above.
Finally I say, if you running around claiming and professing to be ” real ” then be that ALL THE TIME, not when it is convenient. People have to be able to trust you and stand on your word. They need to know that not only can you “check”, but be checked. Being fake shows that you do not love yourself enough to stake your life on the truth. Will the real B.I.T.C.Hes please stand up!
” The truth, having nothing to fear, must be pursued relentlessly in every discipline “, is a quote from the Pepperdine Law School mission statement. It speaks volumes of how important the truth is in all aspects of our lives.Keep a lookout for my book The B.I.T.C.H. Chronicles coming soon – so excited J
S/O to all the real B.I.T.C.Hes: Sandra Bernhard, Roseanne Barr, NeNe Leakes, Rosie O’Donnell, Joan Rivers, Chanita Foster, Dawn Nuefeld, Royce Reed, MuthaKnows, Laura Fogelman, Philana Boles, Mrs. Bridges, CosmoShek, MeccafromUptown, Patrice, Karla Lawrence, Shauna, Beverly Simmons, Tionna Smalls, Reagan Gomez, Wendy Williams, Lorna M., Koffee, Kim Ogletree, Mrs. Powell, Tamara, Angie McAlpine, T. Angie, Herlinda Boswell, Candice Reese, Tracy Blanchard, Yvette, Sydney Chase, Monique Gooden, Zena Benjamin, Alexandria Young and many more…
Posted on March 10, 2011, in ENTERTAINMENT NEWS and tagged Basketball Wives, Chad Ochocinco, Chris Bosh, Christ, Dwight Howard, Kenny Anderson, National Basketball Association, Season finale. Bookmark the permalink. 77 Comments.
Just a bunch of craziness! I like Royce. I use to like Tami, but she is on the wild side now. Suzie tells everything and is not a true friend. Grow up Tami you need mental therapy. All of your so call friends were talking about you when they were riding in the van, so lets see if you go off on them. Really? Hold someones purse hostage and ask them to beg for it. You are nuts!
Tami is such a BULLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SUZIE YOU ARE SO TWO THREE FOUR FACED…..
Tami is so full of shit. Yes, I said it and she’s a fu#@king BIG ass bully/BULL if I ever saw one. A grown ass woman acting like that. Don’t use your past as an excuse to act the way you do. Your butt should be thrown off the show and shaunie should be ashamed of herself for allowing this to happen in her presence as the producer or excutive or whomever she wants to be. Tami has not met the right person/Bitch yet because you need a real beat down from the right person. I wish this show would become a freaking movie. It’s a joke and after tonight’s bullying episode…This show can count me out of the numbers as a viewer. I’ve really tried to be on #teamtami…but come on now. Tami needs some intense therapy and work those personal issues out. If Tami has a hair line or whatever she got going on personally…from hair to talent search…you need to lose all of your contracts. I would not want my professional business name associated with you at all. Basically, Tami is a big bully, no class, can’t dress a**hole!!!
you are a ass hole and i hope someone beat your ass with your none factor ass you are the bicth bicth
Tami you should rush to anger management classes.. Your behavior to Kesha was unbelievable for such a small matter. You talk about the other ladies and other people also. By the way who made you the HNIC. You and Evelyn give ladies a bad name; however you do have the right to be who you are!!! SMH
Also Susie is a two faced back stabbling coward. She is the type of person that Throw A Rock and hide her hands. Kesha you need to get a back bone and :Go Off” on Tami and Susie! At some point you have to defend yourself. However you are a sweet young lady and I appreciate you acting as such.
Tami needs Jesus, she really need to get into a church and do a lot of praying, she uses her pass to justify her actions and it is not working. take it to Jesus in prayer, Don’t be an abuser because you were abused.
I concur! You have to let your light shine when you speak about Christ! Christians show Christlike characters.
Tami is a big bully….I wish she would have taken my purse…she would have had a kick in the chin….now having said that what church does she go to “the devil’s church”. She need to stop giving her money away because clearly counseling is not helping her…she needs to check herself into a Psych ward.
Tami is giving us a bad look. Us As in black women! What an ass hole! NobOdy hAs to RESPECT you tami! U all up on respect and u don’t even respect yourself!!!! What a disgrace on national TV!!
For somebody that bullies everyone that don’t agree with what you say or want…you should be the last to murmur the words out of your mouth that the public is bullying you. We should bully you. Maybe you will pull a cover over that played out hairstyle every season and grow up. I don’t blame your daughters for not wanting you to manage their careers. That should say a lot.
i truly think tammy show out for the cameras.she dont get no points the way she got out on keisha because she keisha was just trying to have a nice time and being humble in a hostile situation.keisha told you she didnt want any trouble but you started getting beer muscles and showing off in front off the other girls and for the cameras.a real lady would have pulled her card in private off camera if you so called felt that strongly about what she said.tammy and evelyn talk about the other cast members constantly.you always preachin about keepin shit real when you not real.keisha just said how she felt about you and the situation that you keep harpin on which really not that serious to go as far asyou took it tammy .she was right you made yourself look like a real fool not her.shaunie set keisha up bacause she knew you were going to act silly like you did.shaunie used both you guys because she and the rest of them females know tammy going to drink and the clown going to come out of her you can almost count on it.the one you should be getting in ass is evelyn for the nasty shit she did to you but no you all up in her butt on some forgiveness shit .i dont get it tammy are you for real .to real bitches as you like to say thats braking the sister code and aint no forgiveness or coming back from that.the tough girl act from evelyn looks real fake and i can tell you not built like that real talk because all the fights you act like you wanted to get in you really didnt want because you wasnt really trying to hit nobody with that bottle.close as you were to her and you missed ….please get real .little royce was getting out on evelyn and tammy really dug in evelyn ass thats why evelyn scared to fuck with tammy and anyone who watch the show no thats true bill.you cant fight evelyn so stop tryin to impress and go hard like tammy.as for suzie she need her ass beat for snitchin all the time .she aint no true friend to nobody.she hear shit and go back and tell like a rat that she is and drop back and watch the drama happen.watch the scenes shes in and see how she try to get people to say shit an d hall ass to tell.as for jen although it may be true you do seem to be stuck up keep doing your thing girl because evelyn is jelous of you getting your hustle on .she got made with you over some bull when its really because your makin big moves in your life and not on her coat tail no more.evelyn see you dont really need her like she thought.you doing your thing on your own and dont need to depend on no man like she does.evelyn pretty much confirmed what you basically said about chad when she made the statement to him about using condems on other females .he aint going to be loyal to her and she know it.evelyn is sneaky and a freak because she sleep with chad the first night and in a mans world thats being a freak bccause a real lady would make you wait till she pretty much see what kind of game you runnin first before droppin them panties.keep gettin yours jens and let her waste her energy haten and maybe evelyn will reilize one day she lost a good friend over a man .the statement you made wasnt a big deal truth be told.truth be told when chad roll out on her ass which knowing chads track record with females you would have been the one she could have leaned on and she will see that one day.royce keep being sweet and a lady the way you carry it.stay strong royce i like your style girl…..im just sayin……………………peace.
Yooo as soon as tami stops sucking Evelyn’s dick I will start watching the show again
HOT GHETTO MESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAMI WANTS EVERYTHING HER WAY..YOU ARE WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, AND EVELYN YOU KNOW YOU DID NOT WRITE THOSE CARDS OUT, BECAUSE YOUR VOCABULARY IS VERY LIMITED. SUZIE YOU ARE A SNAKE , IT SHOWED IN THE WATER, SHAUNIE, YOU ARE A MOM WHAT KIND OF AN EXAMPLE ARE YOU SHOWING THEM. GUILTY BY ASSOCIATION. ( IS IT WORTH IT) YOU CAN TAKE THE WOMEN OUT OF THE GHETTO, BUT THE GHETTO IS IN THEM AND NO AMOUNT OF MAKE UP WILL HIDE GHETTO…….YOU ARE FINALLY SEEING THE LIGHT, GOD IS NOT PLEASED WITH YOU.SHAUNIE.
TAMI YOU ARE A BULLY. i WON’T BE WATCHING BBW ANYMORE. CAN’T STOMACH IT. YOU DON’T NEED DRAMA TO HAVE A SUCCESSFUL SHOW . THE VIEWERS ARE DROPPING LIKE FLIES. WHAT A DISGRACE THIS SHOW HAS BECOME
Tami is a crazy nut. She mentioned someone mentoring her and the others,because of their behavior. Well damn, didn’t you go to counseling………..shit didn’t seem to help your crazy ass. I can only say…. you really showed your ass……..and you are freaking ignorant. You took Keisha’s purse and had it sitting in your freaking lap. Also, you were even going through her purse and phone. Now, what would you have done, if she did the exact same thing? Fly off the handle like a maniac. Shawnie is an instigator………..and is scared of Tami and Evelyn. She claims, she does not like drama, well hell………she always inputs little small comments to add fuel to the fire. Susie isn’t anyone’s friend because she repeats everything. Evelyn is crazy too…………and does not know how to act like a lady. Shawnie you are not a business women…………………you are a black ignorant female………..with no class. Tami, I really believed you changed???????????????????????
Tami, & to the rest of your INNER CIRCLE SHAME ON ALL OF YOU.What kind of example are you setting for young women? You all have a duty as adults on television to set a example on how grown women deal with conflict,but it seems that Evelyn & you have a set of standards for you both, and one for anyone who does not kiss your butt! The Countess said it best “MONEY DON’T BUY YOU CLASS! I suggest you in up your therapy sessions to 24/7,because you and Evelyn could really use it! I bet your daughters are really proud of your behavior.
I have NEVER wrote on any blog, but you all are a DISGRACE to all women! Stop being a bully and control your anger, you should be ashamed of yourself.
tammy sayin fuck royce and she not my friend was foul.royce was not out of line for what she said because as a supposedly friend tammy needed to hear that.but tammy being silly and an asshole again took it to another level.tammy stop frontin for the cameras it shines a bad light on you.that trashy mouth of yours tammy not a good look.fine as tammy is she should let some of her beauty and lady like show from the inside.personally i was in tammys corner at one time when she first came on the show because she seem more down to earth and humble.i thought tammy would be standin up for the little man not beeing a bully to them.when she first came on the show suzie,evelyn and jenn looked down on her to like she was not on their level with the food stamp jokes and not havin money remember that.tammy did not like that .tammy thought it wasnt fair to judge her remember that tammy.evelyn fucked your husband and talked shit about you act like you bff with her.please!!!!you must be crazy. i think royce is a nice young lady with a big personality who although may be small in size has a kind heart and will stand up for her self and others if their wrong.big ups to royce.
evelyn just be talkin out the side of her neck.you lost a good friend in jenn over some real bull.you went through all that drama with your girl jenn whom you been tight with 14 years becauseof something she said about chad whom you havent even known that long.and what was said wasnt even that heavy.all that shit you said about her husband eric and tried to set her up with other guys behind erics back are you serious evelyn.you the one thats shady as hell evelyn.stop frontin evelyn you aint tough or for real built like that because as soon as the law got mentioned you was scared as shit.so fall back a little evelyn this aint for you.tryin to act like tammy to impress people and the cameras is going to bite you in the ass trust…shawnie pimpin everyone of you ladies also she instigate half the drama that goes on by talkin about people and going along and co-signin shit that tammy and evelyn are clearly wrong about.jenn or royce did nothing to shawnie for her to have beef but bacause of some others being mad she jumped on the band wagon.shawnie was supposed to be the responsible level headed one at least the first couple seasons it seemed she had everything in control when she stepped on the scene.what happened shawnie iknow your true colors started to show.snake in the grass to get those ratings no matter how many freinships are destroyed along the way.then she play innocent like she cant believe the shit thats going on. jenn keep doing what your doin and stay focused because you seem to be more likable when your not around certain company…evelyn. keisha stay humble and lady like.you dont have to act like a clown to have self respect and it dosnt make make you weak for not feedin in to tammys bullshit…..peace ladys
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